Where have all the Queens gone? We need more Fun Queens


A Flounce and Tiara Time on Saturday is a much deserved break from the everyday.  Good-ness, I need that…Plus Mary’s photo shoot and maybe the Jr mints photo…

This Membership Directory and Calendar project is going to be wonderful. I hope.

So the Membership Project is continuing in a way I am surprised about.  Actually I am so cynical I am not that surprised, but frankly I had expected a little more enthusiasm.  Just a really teeny tiny small bit more. But that requires buy-in and buckets of Royal energy of which, we as a group are suffering from a shortage.  Oh well, we do have a core group.  Thank God for that! 

The core group of outrageous, laughing, joyous MGQs will represent in Savannah. Represent-Represent Represent-Savannah!  Of 30 MJQs, we have 7 who will be attending the flounce on Saturday.  They will bring 5 Jr. Mints. Mary will have her photo made and we will get on the trolley. A few Core group members will miss it, and are deeply saddened that they are not available.  (If you are a Fun Queen, a Key Queen, or part of Core group, you know who you are. Wink Wink nudge-nudge. This blog post is not about you, dear.) 

The excuses I have heard remind me of the party Leslie Ballenger designed the invitation for way back in 2006 I believe it was.  The “Not a Good Time of Year to have a party, Party.”  Then, as now I find the same problems and the same success.  I have found out over the years who loves being a Queen and who does not!  I have seen people stay in the group for years and not attend a thing. (I have had one dear Queen TRY to quit because she felt she did not fit in and was too busy, but I am too selfish to let her quit.  So I paid her dues and she is in.)

I have discovered who is always willing to try something fun (Dottie) and who will rain on the parade.  I have learned what excuses people rely on to avoid doing anything.  And unfortunately, I have learned that no matter what balance of cash value the Treasury has in the Royal Bank, we need more cash. 

Thankfully, I would write a check everyday of the week for a chance to laugh, so donning a tiara and chiffon is a priceless experience and I am truly fortunate to have the disposable income to throw at the evening.  Hell-o!  It is really a bargain.  For a mere One hundred dollars I can plan a Queens’ event.

So even though we have a dues requirement, (which I wish we had not even put into place), I have learned that you can spend thousands on a party or nothing on a party and the level of success in totally, completely, utterly, irrevocably, (any more -ly words?) linked to the level of enthusiasm of the Attending Queens.  So having seen that, I challenge each MJQ (each Queen Who frankly my dear, Gives a damn) to find one human being…preferably female, who possesses a deep vein of joy and energy and loves being Royal. 

I want at least 5 new MQS by next year, but I have always asked for that and it does not happen.  Why?  Because you have to have that sparkle to see it in others.  You have to CULTIVATE that in yourself or it will wither and die.  If You really start thinking that you can’t possibly be seen in a costume dress out in public, because “What would people think?”   When you start being concerned about what people think when you are simply having a tad bit bit of innocent fun, then just close the coffin, honey.  Close the damn coffin!  It is over. Or at least, your love of youth, innocence, frivolity and swishing about in great skirts of happiness is over.   Close the coffin on your reign as Queen.    

Now you may say, “Queen Erica, You sound like you are being too critical of people who have found their joy somewhere else.  They have other demands.  Other interests.  Other Friends. Maybe the MJQs are just not fun for them. What is the matter with that?’ 

My answer, dear one, is, “That is the point!”   They HAVE found their joy with other interests and other friends.  If the MJQs never see you and you never participate, why are you in this group?  If it is not fun?  What are you doing?  The core group will party on with or without those missing Queens, but why pretend to care?  Why even be in the group at all?  Become a retired Queen.  Label yourself a sustain-er. 

But if you tell me you are a member, and I plan a get together, I figure you might, (right around the time hell is cooling off a few degrees,) you might grace us with your presence and then some of the younger Key Queens will come up to me at the party and ask “Who is that lady over there?  Is SHE a Queen?  I have never seen her.”   We have a hand full of ladies who never come to anything. EVER.  If we have not seen you at an event in a 2 years period…you are too busy.  If you have not attended a flounce in 3-4 years, you need to retire.  I am not your mother and I will not just kick you out of the group.  That is not my job. 

Which brings me to the one of the myriad of reasons the Membership Directory is in need.  If you claim to be a Queen, you at the very least should know who the other queens are.  Maybe not know their darn NAME.  That would be asking too much.  But you should be able to look over at someone and know that they are a member of our group. So if you never attend a function, you are required, (Yes, I said It!)  Required to participate this year when we plan a photo shoot for YOU. So your darn picture can be in the directory. Crazy as it seems. 

And no!  Do not hire your own photographer.  This is NOT a competition to see who can take the best photo.  That is one thing we do not do: Compete with each other.  It is not going to be at your home. I have hired someone to do all the images so it will have a cohesive look and we will not get into competitive photography.  It will be in Public Downtown, or goodness maybe at Tybee (and definitely at Wormsloe because Emma called it first.)

(opps. ) I feel another rant coming on.  On the nature of female relationships and the combative thread that all people innately possess and the one-ups-manship and how we need to stop trying to out-do each other. Stop trying to be the top dog and compete on every darn thing in every location in every moment, in the world and in our community and at schools…And why do I have to send out 4 emails?  FOUR to get people to RSVP and some still have not Responded.  Really.  If I mail an invitation the same thing happens.  Mail OR email; it is the same story.  So how do I plan a party if I can not get a proper count of who is in and who is out? 

I think we need 60 damn Queens so we will have a core group of 20 who can a party at any given time.  20 is a good number for a party downtown and to get 20 in attendance, we need 60 MJQs. And where in the world do we find 30 more queens to join.  This is not the Ya-Yas or the Sweet Potatoes. Hell-o! They only had a core group of 5 or 6 . AND the Ya-Yas where are all fictional friends and do were the Sweet Potato Queens. That is mission impossible right there.  This is crazy that you can’t find enough great Royalty lovers to be part of this.Enough friends who enjoy this kind of thing.  Darn they do not have to even BE friends.  Just ladies who like being silly.  How many times to you have to go over this stuff?  You are like a dog with a bone.  Just let it be what it is.  What it is.  Be what it is…opps.  This rant is beginning to give me a tad bit of headache.  I better stop now and have a cup of something. Something to calm my nerves.  Tea?  Sure. It is rather early in the morning. Tea will have to do. Big Rants are always followed by Tea. Or a martini, I forget which…

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